worldoffatcraft
07-01-2007, 10:50 AM
lol this is my first story like ever so don't laugh if you don't like it but critique me as much as possible so i can get better.........
my main char name in this story is....Dall'vua I'm making up story as i go no joke
when the trolls speak I'm not spelling wrong just trying to give them some accent.
It was a bright night on my small coastal village, it was as if the night sky night was on fire.
I could smell strong aromas from the chicken and murloc legs being prepared in the closer huts,
great and small drums were being pounded and slapped as the beautiful women of my village all danced,
It was a night of celebration.
Me and two other boys were all at the age required to join the never ending wars against the lesser beings on this great continent,
one boy had trained to become a priest another boy went the path of a shaman but i wishing to earn the most honor and fame possible went the path of the warrior.
"Hold still boy!" my mother said as she decorated my face with symbols of strength, using a sponge like ball of moist white powder,
my head jerked back quick by my little sister who was busy braiding my ghost white hair into a long stiff braid,
then again my head jerked to the side as my father roughly sharpened my foot long tusks with a sharp red dagger,
I do not favor the tusks but my father insisted that i let them grow as large as possible
to pump great fear into the hearts of the gnomes, nightelfs, and humans on the battle field.
finally i was free to move from my stool.
I slowly walked over to the corner of the hut,
there lied my great two handed axe next to it was a set of armor,
That had blue insignias written all over them my father said that the insignias were spells which what gave my armor its power.
Then came a raspy deep voice from from the side of me breaking my thought "Betta stop stearin, and start wearin thos things ya got sittin there" it was Jah'veil the shaman boy,
In the most tribal decorated armor i had ever seen,
"yess Dall'vua puttit on ya big bonehead boi" said the priest boy shuol'merah as he stepped in my hut fully submersed in the bright red of his robes.
I gave them both a half smile then turned back to the armor and began to put it on.
In less time then it takes the the great Takk to patrol his territory,
I was in full gear as i walked into the center of the hut were my family sat in wait,
As i looked upon there faces flushed in awe,
silence fell upon the room.
Then my mother let out a cry and buried her head into the stone chest of my father,
my sister gently rubbed my mothers back while she assured her everything was going to be fine,
my father who was not much of a talker proudly looked upon me and my two brethren in arms
then in a voice deep enough to make the solid wood of the floor of our hut crumble into a million pieces of bark,
my father said
"Be on your way, and bring Honor, not sadness back with you"
Me and my two companions with all seriousness nodded and calmly stepped towards the exit of the hut.
From the first step out of the hut into the village it was like a whole different world
All the women cheered for us,
the fire breathers all let out flames large enough to make a dragons tail tuck between its legs with fear,
and the dancers did flips and hand stands worthy enough to be performers at Thralls victory parties.
As me Jah'veil and Shuol'merah walked toward our mounts who were dressed in beads and feathers,
We were showered with gifts like food, scroll buffs and healing potions
with bags fully loaded we mounted and were on our way to the great capitol of Orgrimmar,
there we would meet Thrall see our tribe leader and be assigned to a battle.
As the beautiful sun peaked its head over the great plateaus of northern Duroter we had arrived at the great gates of Orgrimmar.
"to be sso earli in the young lite of da day tere shore iz alredE a large gathering of Duelz" said Shoul'merah "i noE i can smell dA undead and Tauren from herre!" said Jah'veil,
we all let out a great bellow,
which was joined in by a orc who unstealthed his self in front of us.
He startled my mount which made me fall to the ground,with the reaction time of a rogue,
I swung my great axe in with no hesitation stopping just short of the orcs
to be continued...........
was it worthy enough for me to right more or should i quit?:ponder:
sorry for the early mistypes lol i had to reedit my story forgot we cant say bl**d and h*te my original story title would have been bl**d sweat and honor but.......
you do what u can with what your given lol
my main char name in this story is....Dall'vua I'm making up story as i go no joke
when the trolls speak I'm not spelling wrong just trying to give them some accent.
It was a bright night on my small coastal village, it was as if the night sky night was on fire.
I could smell strong aromas from the chicken and murloc legs being prepared in the closer huts,
great and small drums were being pounded and slapped as the beautiful women of my village all danced,
It was a night of celebration.
Me and two other boys were all at the age required to join the never ending wars against the lesser beings on this great continent,
one boy had trained to become a priest another boy went the path of a shaman but i wishing to earn the most honor and fame possible went the path of the warrior.
"Hold still boy!" my mother said as she decorated my face with symbols of strength, using a sponge like ball of moist white powder,
my head jerked back quick by my little sister who was busy braiding my ghost white hair into a long stiff braid,
then again my head jerked to the side as my father roughly sharpened my foot long tusks with a sharp red dagger,
I do not favor the tusks but my father insisted that i let them grow as large as possible
to pump great fear into the hearts of the gnomes, nightelfs, and humans on the battle field.
finally i was free to move from my stool.
I slowly walked over to the corner of the hut,
there lied my great two handed axe next to it was a set of armor,
That had blue insignias written all over them my father said that the insignias were spells which what gave my armor its power.
Then came a raspy deep voice from from the side of me breaking my thought "Betta stop stearin, and start wearin thos things ya got sittin there" it was Jah'veil the shaman boy,
In the most tribal decorated armor i had ever seen,
"yess Dall'vua puttit on ya big bonehead boi" said the priest boy shuol'merah as he stepped in my hut fully submersed in the bright red of his robes.
I gave them both a half smile then turned back to the armor and began to put it on.
In less time then it takes the the great Takk to patrol his territory,
I was in full gear as i walked into the center of the hut were my family sat in wait,
As i looked upon there faces flushed in awe,
silence fell upon the room.
Then my mother let out a cry and buried her head into the stone chest of my father,
my sister gently rubbed my mothers back while she assured her everything was going to be fine,
my father who was not much of a talker proudly looked upon me and my two brethren in arms
then in a voice deep enough to make the solid wood of the floor of our hut crumble into a million pieces of bark,
my father said
"Be on your way, and bring Honor, not sadness back with you"
Me and my two companions with all seriousness nodded and calmly stepped towards the exit of the hut.
From the first step out of the hut into the village it was like a whole different world
All the women cheered for us,
the fire breathers all let out flames large enough to make a dragons tail tuck between its legs with fear,
and the dancers did flips and hand stands worthy enough to be performers at Thralls victory parties.
As me Jah'veil and Shuol'merah walked toward our mounts who were dressed in beads and feathers,
We were showered with gifts like food, scroll buffs and healing potions
with bags fully loaded we mounted and were on our way to the great capitol of Orgrimmar,
there we would meet Thrall see our tribe leader and be assigned to a battle.
As the beautiful sun peaked its head over the great plateaus of northern Duroter we had arrived at the great gates of Orgrimmar.
"to be sso earli in the young lite of da day tere shore iz alredE a large gathering of Duelz" said Shoul'merah "i noE i can smell dA undead and Tauren from herre!" said Jah'veil,
we all let out a great bellow,
which was joined in by a orc who unstealthed his self in front of us.
He startled my mount which made me fall to the ground,with the reaction time of a rogue,
I swung my great axe in with no hesitation stopping just short of the orcs
to be continued...........
was it worthy enough for me to right more or should i quit?:ponder:
sorry for the early mistypes lol i had to reedit my story forgot we cant say bl**d and h*te my original story title would have been bl**d sweat and honor but.......
you do what u can with what your given lol